South Immortal: Chapter 9

AN: stop flaming ok! I dntn see all da episodz! dis is frum da movie ok so itz nut my folt if shila swers! besuizds I SED SHE HAD A HEDACHE! and da reson garryson dosent lik stan now is coz hes christian and raven is a satanist! MCR ROX!

I was so mad and sad. I couldn't believe Kyle for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I did it with Kyle.

Then all of a suddenly, an horrible man with black eyes and hair and everything started flying towards me on a surfboard! He had black hair (basically like Damien in the show) and he was wearing all black but it was obvious he wasn't gothic. It was…… Damien!

"No!" I shouted in a scared voice but then Damien shouted "Rectus Dominus!" and I couldn't run away.

"Pot pie!" I shouted at him throwing a pie. Damien fell of his board and started to scream. I felt bad for him even though I'm a sadist so I stopped.

"Indigo." he yelled. "Thou must kill Raven Marsh!"

I thought about Raven and his sexah eyes and his gothic black hair and how his face looks just like Trey Parker. I remembered that Kyle had said I didn't understand, so I thought, what if Kyle went out with Raven before I went out with him and they broke up? (Non-Parody AN: That's pretty much what Kyle said last chapter!)

"No, Damien!" I shouted back.

Damien gave me a gun. "No! Please!" I begged.

"Thou must!" he yelled. "If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Kyle!"

"How did you know?" I asked in a surprised way.

Damien got a dude-ur-so-retarded look on his face. "I hath telekinesis." he answered cruelly. "And if you doth not kill Raven, then thou know what will happen to Kyle!" he shouted. Then he flew away angrily on his surfboard.

I was so scared and mad I didn't know what to do. Suddenly Kyle came into the woods.

"Kyle!" I said. "Hi!"

"Hi." he said back but his face was all sad. He was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner kind of like a pentagram (geddit) between Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"No." he answered.

"I'm sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me." I expelled.

"That's okay." he said all depressed and we went back into South Park together making out.